Use the mode of expression instead that of repression
Sep 19 2013
First things first, what is our attitude when faced with a crisis? The choice lies right there, in that moment. We can choose to blame the circumstance, the problem itself or in the bargain, our parents, spouse, friends, children or bosses. Complaints, somehow, have a nasty habit of perpetuating themselves. Or we can look at the problem with a keen eye, how to get over it, under it, across it or around it. How to take action to solve it? When you hear bad news, shut your eyes for five minutes. It gives you time to absorb the news and reflect on how to deal with it. Maybe even sleep on it for a few days, to understand the enemy to fight it. Most times, failures blame circumstances, however, winners look to rise above it.
This is the tiny first step, because the same amount of effort can be put into resolving the problem, as much as you would put into crying over it. Effort is the same, however, the choice of which way to go about it is ours alone. The speed at which defeat overcomes us can be the speed at which action is taken to engage in overcoming the issue. We all have problems we need to fight, insecurities we need to address and fears we need to face. When we express them, we are one step away from acknowledging and correcting them. A winner is one who goes out of his way to keep correcting his attitude. It is only about having the right attitude and self-reflection. Correcting perspective, knowing it is not only tolerance required in today’s world, but co-existence. Broadly speaking, you can like or dislike the place you are at, the people you are with or the job you are doing...this too is your choice. Maybe there is nothing you can do about the tedious job given to you, so do the best you can in those circumstances. Bring to the boring task a spark that makes others notice or compliment you. Bring a smile to your face, if one really forces oneself, even that is possible. Your attitude endows the circumstance with hope or despair.
This line from the grande dame of theatre, Stella Adler, says, “The wisdom of acting lies in knowing that it is not what a person says or does, but what reaction you have to what he says or does, that creates your attitude towards that person”. So, it is our reaction that creates attitude. Therefore, it’s important to control our reaction, correct our reaction and constantly keep a vigil over our reactions.
Giving voice to a feeling also puts it into perspective. You just need to listen to that inner voice deep within your heart. And at the same time, have the courage to correct your attitude or thoughts, if negative. Optimism is nothing but telling yourself that ‘this too shall pass’ and ‘better times will come’. Just as inertia leads to further inertia, so does hope leads to further hope! Just do not lose faith in yourself, in the precious person you are! All we need to do is have a challenging spirit, and enjoy engaging with life! Let me tell you even the gods favour a strong warrior!
(The writer is a theatre director and novelist)